ALL IN A DAYS WORK....

The familiar glow of morning light shines through the window and I can hear his sweet baby sounds. He giggles and coos and sucks on his feet. I'm tired. I had a fitted sleep filled with hazy memories of diaper changes and midnight nursings. I roll out of bed and put on my slippers and slide on my robe. I put on the light and my baby boy sees me and his face lights up in a tender smile. It's like sunshine hitting my face on a cold day and any pang of resentment I harnessed for my lack of rest washes away in an instant. I gently pick him up and cradle him in my arms and breath in his sweet smell. He laughs with excitement, his high pitched belly laugh that makes me laugh too. I place him on the changing table and as I tend to him I become increasingly aware that I'm being watched.
I go about my business trying to act as if I don't notice them. Little hushed giggles coming from the hallway. Like a flash, my daughter comes running into my room and rushes to her baby brothers feet. She likes his feet, nibbles on them while more belly giggles fill the room. I notice my daughters outfit. She's wearing her brothers soccer shirt and his old church pants. I quietly chuckle to myself that she finds this comfortable sleeping attire. Her hair is disheveled and her eyes have that slightly droopy look that shows that she's just woken up. My son Andy walks into the room next. He immediately comes and embraces me, as he has done every morning since he was a boy, my gentle natured, cuddly son. He picks up the baby and we head out to the kitchen to start our day.
As I make my coffee out walks my son Nikolas. He's rubbing the sleep from his eyes and I notice that he's wearing his shirt backwards, his hair's sticking straight up. He wanders over to me slowly and gives me a long hug, resting his head on my shoulder, which, at eleven, he now reaches. The baby sees him and squeals in excitement, my first and last born, tied in a special bond that bridges their age difference without notice. As I sip my coffee I notice that Alexia is sitting on the kitchen floor reading a book to her dolly. She says each word, enunciating each letter slowly and carefully, taking her time. The sweet part of this scene is that she's holding the baby in a self made "baby sling", much like the one I wear most of the time. Nikolas is the first one to begin his schoolwork, doing so without me asking, making me thankful that I am blessed with a child who is self-motivated. Andy is weaving in and out of the room, hurriedly, hoping I won't notice the remote control he's taken apart. He does this "for fun" to see how it works. I ask him if he's started his work, to which he replies "I'm doing a science experiment. It counts Mama, it's science!" I decide to stop him, only because we have our weekly home school cooperative in two hours and he needs to do actual work. Before I can enter his room, he comes running out dressed up in his Halloween costume. This is funny because it's the costume he wore several years before so it's REALLY REALLY tight! This makes my mom, who's sitting at the table eating her breakfast, laugh so hard she snorts! More giggling ensues and now the baby squeals again with delight. This high pitched noise excites our chihuahua, who begins howling in a yodeling type howl, happy to contribute to her family's conversation.
Andy looks over and sees Nik doing his work so he decides to start his. He sits down at his desk and starts working. He is still in his ninja costume. As I work with Alexia on her math problems I notice that Andy is, once again, out of his seat. I call from the study "Andy, GET IN HERE, NOW!" No answer. I call again. No answer AGAIN! I mutter obscenities under my breath as I walk towards his room and BOOM!!!!!!!!! Andy, jumps from around the corner, scaring me to death! More muttered obscenities, to which Alexia chimes in from another room "Mama, you said a potty wawd!" Her odd Boston sounding accent gets me every time, and I can barely keep from laughing as I say "You are right sweetie. Mommy should not say that word." Andy now realizes it will be defcon 5 if he doesn't act like he's really taking this work thing seriously so he, still in the ninja costume, grabs a book off the bookcase and buries his nose in it, as if deeply enthralled with what's in it. Sadly for him, he fails to notice that it's a thesaurus.
I just stare across the room with a poker face. This is a far better tactic than yelling with Andy. He is a a sensitive child who, all kidding aside, wants to do well. He simply is our "class clown, and likes to start the day by making those around him smile. Andy can't read my mood so he FINALLY decides to do his work! I go to play a language arts game with Alexia, only to find her sitting at the table with ALL of her book work done! She is grinning from ear to ear, beaming with pride. I give her a great big hug and thank her for being such a "big girl". She responds by saying "No, I am and you AND daddy's big girl" then she darts off into her room, only to quickly turn around to give Eli kisses first. I go from child to child, at this point,helping them, as needed. Sometimes this means talking them through a problem, other times it simply means repeating back the question to them so they figure it out themselves. We gather our belongings and head out the door to be with friends at our weekly coop. I buckle the baby in his car seat and get in my van. As I look in my rear view mirror I see my children, all sitting quietly, looking out the window. I get a tinge of bittersweet aching in my belly for I know these times are priceless. My kids are all growing so fast. Nikolas put 's on our favorite song and we head off down the.....
HOLY BATMAN!!!! I notice that ALL the kids have on their Halloween costume.....more obscenities muttered.....more Lexi going "Mama you said a potty wawwwwwd!"
And such is a day in the life of a home school parent.
Quite frankly, I wouldn't have it any other way.

"I Knew She Wasn't Shy!!!!!!"

So this week something magical happened! Something that, I am so lucky to have witnessed. In order for me to tell you, I'm going to have to give you some background information. This isn't my first year of homeschooling. I actually dabbled in it before, when my boys were between 6 & 8. I say dabbled because I lacked the confidence that I have now, so I always had known in the back of my head that my kids would end up back in school again. At the time, I had a lot of family members second guessing my abilities. I also, had custody of my God-daughter, a teenager who , at the time, was really struggling. My focus had to be on her, more often than not. I also am my WORST critic! I let the "should's" invade my brain. The "should's" are things like "Shouldn't he be reading?" or "Well, my Brutus read the Iliad at the age of 4. He is now working on his P.H.D at Yale university. He's 8" Comparing your children to others is a big no no in my book. It will only cloud how you view your child and you will surely miss out on seeing the wonderful abilities that your child has. No good can come from it!
Now, as I boldly enter the world of home-schooling for the 2nd time, I am armed with so much more confidence in my abilities to guide my children in the world. Chalk it up to more experience and having spoken to enough veteran HS parents. I don't stress if we don't get to everything that I wanted to that day. I don't feel inadequate if another parent tells me of their child's amazing abilities. I feel happy for them and know that my kids are exactly at the place they need to be. Learning is a part of our lifestyle so my kids are less inclined to get upset if I ask them to do "work" with me on a Saturday or Sunday. I am learning to focus more on the whole picture, not just the parts. So, if Andy asks if he can tell me the answers to an assignment instead of writing it, I am learning to be ok with that. The point is to make sure he is acquiring knowledge, not MAKING him write it. I trust that, in time, he will learn to enjoy writing somewhat. He is extremely creative and artistic. He is also very sensitive and able to clearly communicate his feelings. That's such a precious gift to be able to, at 10 years old, state how you hurt, how and why you are angry, how you see yourself in situations. It's only a matter of time and maturity, I think, for him to see that writing can be creative and artistic.
Speaking of maturity, the something I was speaking about earlier....the magical something is about my Lexi(aka "Monkey Marie"). She was always such a little character at home. She likes to dress up in her brothers clothes, she's loud, silly, warm and loving, highly verbal(with a Boston accent that we aren't sure where she acquired it??), prone to break out in odd dance moves for the fun of it, a melodic and harmonious singer that enjoys breaking out in song for no reason, is a little fish who, when she was baptized didn't cry, she laughed out loud because she loves water so much, strong-willed yet very respectful, seems to be lacking the "mean gene", cuddly girl who nursed for a VERY long time, gentle sister who really loves her siblings. She is the type of child that, in a fit of anger, has never said "I hate you!" Instead, she internalizes things so she might yell "You hate ME!"
Lexi was this way at HOME. However, as soon as we went out in public, you would never know it. She became a painfully shy child who froze up if spoken to by anyone she didn't know. Upon entering kindergarten, these shy feelings only exacerbated. I felt a sharp pang in the pit of my stomach the first time that I volunteered in my sweet daughter's class as I saw her avoiding interaction of any kind with the other children. The contrast between how she acted in the safety of our home from how she acted at school was remarkable! Then, starting in June, we began our home school journey. As time has gone on I have noticed a slight blossoming in her public persona. Then, we started going to our first Tallahassee Home school Group Park Day two weeks ago and everything changed. We are also involved in a co-op and home school soccer. I noticed my child approaching other little girls to play. I noticed that when adults try to make a connection she responds. Then, the unthinkable happened yesterday. On the way to my Dr's appt. she turned and looked at me and proclaimed "Mama, I am not shy anymore!!!!" In the doctors office she went up to different nurses and doctors and playfully introduced herself. She circulated the room and enjoyed having interactions with everyone she encountered. My child has come out of her shell, so to speak. It was a wonderful to thing to witness. I have witnessed it before. My son, Nikolas was the same way.....until I began home schooling him. In a matter of weeks, the same thing occurred with him. I recognize this as a normal part of what naturally evolves when your child is surrounded by so many parents. It must feel safer. I have noticed the children are kinder in home school circles. Not better, just less prone to use ugly or derogatory statements to each other. Maybe that's why. Maybe it's because I am never too far away from her now and she feels safe to be herself. I don't know the why, I only know the how. The common denomintor seems to be home educating my children. It has happened twice now, when I pulled my child from the public education system, both times, in a short amount of time. It is a glorious thing to watch unfold, to see your child lose their insecurities, in a matter of weeks. Maybe they just matured really quickly, but, I believe it is a direct result of the environment that home- schooling offers. It's one of the reasons I began home educating my children. I wanted them to have the opportunity to have a childhood that lacked all the school drama. I wanted them to feel free to be eccentric and unusual without being put down for it. Uniqueness seems to be celebrated in the home school community. I've noticed that the parents are like this , as well. We embrace each others differences, even celebrate them! I know this because I feel this same feeling of acceptance, too. I can't speak for everyone but, over all, despite having exceptionally different ways of home educating our children, we all bond over our common goal of wanting the best for our kids. It is as communal as you can get!
With that, I need to begin our day, at home, as a family. My children keep coming in and poking at what I'm doing. "Mama, what are you writing, they ask", like it's some secret operation. My daughter keeps coming and sitting on my lap to get cuddles and kisses. My oldest son keeps coming in and reading his newest book to me. My sweet Andy is in the living room building a model. I am typing while wearing my 6 month old on my back in a sling. Yes, I feel blessed :)

Edible History!!!

Right now, in our homeschool, we are exploring the fall of Rome. We have learned so much together, this past week! We learned what a plague was, what Anno Domini means, what a "Hun" is and that's just a snippet of the new information floating around in our brains! We are using "The Story of the World" Book # 2 in the series, The Middle Ages. Here's a link: http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0971412936

Last week, I read straight from the book and followed up with some fun activities from the accompanying workbook. However, this week, we are going to branch off and read some of the suggested reads and enjoy some of the fun activities from it, as well. Tonight, we are going to build a "Roman Pillar" out of sugar cookie dough and bake it. We are going to use toothpicks to etch and make it really detailed. Last night, we "ate like a Roman Soldier." We ate with our hands and cooked the food over a fire in tin foil. We thought about what it must have been like for a Roman soldier. He must have been "starving" after a battle so he wouldn't be picky. This encouraged my oldest son, Nikolas to eat veggies!!! He HATES veggies so this was a wonderful surprise. He really delved deep for this activity, even looking up more information on the Internet. I wanted to share some pictures and show you that learning, really retaining information, happens through experience and enjoyable activities. It didn't matter that we didn't dig a hole in the ground and cook like a real soldier. The kids really role-played and tried to empathize with what it was like for a Roman soldier. This opened up discussions and topics that we had covered in our read-alouds so I know that the kids are learning the material. This week we are going to dress up like a Celt and read Aesop's Fables. Sounds fun, doesn't it!!!

Sent from my iPhone

I'm Not Perfect and Either are You AND That's OK.

Progress, not perfection. That's been my motto lately. I think if didn't say that, I'd go bonkers comparing myself to others. Let me start out by telling you things about myself that I wish you didn't know: I yell more than I should, I used to work out daily and now I just go for short walks with the kids so I've kind of let myself go, I can be impatient, I get up too early then stay up too late, I don't like being told what to do so I can't decide on a curriculum, I can be critical(I am actively working on this one), I can be a push over, I hate to cook unless I am in the "Zone", then I like it, I hate doing laundry and am bad at putting it away, I let my dogs kiss my face.

Whew!!! That wasn't so bad but, it's hard to see it all in print. I am sure there is a ton more but, I have to clean tonight because we are having people over tomorrow. I have found that, when I became a mom I was guilty of making judgement's. Experience has taught me that there is no BETTER way. There are lots of ways to do things and I can usually find some way that they would make sense to me if I try. Lets make it a point not to be so hard on each other. As women, we are constantly pitted against each other in the media. Whether we work or not or whether our lifestyles are the same shouldn't matter. The point we need to see is that most of us are doing our best each day for those we love. Period. We could learn so much from each other if we focused on that and let go of our judgement. For me, judgement comes from my insecurities. For this next week I am going to make it a point to read about those whose lifestyles are different from mine for inspiration. Will you join me?

"Like Oil & Water"

Prior to Nik and I getting married, we were both warned that our difference's might cause a divergence in our familial life. Equally, he and I, both have issue's with wanting to dominate and control. As I'm sure you can imagine, our marriage has hit some rough patches along the way. It started literally, from the day we were married. My wedding was a beautiful and heartfelt occasion! It also lasted three hours long, was in another language & we didn't get to say the part about " I pledge allegiance to the dothness, for which it stands, to honor & obey, forever more, in sickness & in health". Well, whatever vows sound like, anyway, that's not part of a Greek wedding ceremony. The fight for the upper hand started with an old wives tale & has continued on ,since. There is a part, during the ceremony, that if I managed to step on Nik's foot, during the precise moment, that the priest said a particular phrase, then, henceforth, I would have the upper hand in the marriage. If Nik managed to beat me to it, then, it just meant that it was a silly old wives tale. Did I mention the fact that the ceremony was in Greek and,at the time, the only Greek words I knew were "hello" and "no sex tonight" so he ,most definitely, had the advantage.
The pictures from this day are hysterical! From all the foot stepping we were both in tremendous pain!! Do not underestimate toe pain! Those little suckers swelled up in my shoes within the first five minutes of the ceremony and I would not have been surprised, if my shoes would have needed to be cut off my feet, by the end of the night!. I am sure Nik's friends thought that he looked dazed and confused because they had given him Ecstasy the night before and kept him out until the sun came up. My friends, on the other hand, believed that my pained expression was due to something completely unrelated. They knew that I was secretly four months pregnant and blamed my strange facial expression's on being tightly girdled and thus unable to inhale fully. To this day, the battle of who won that little game has yet, to be determined.
Over time, these type's of issue's leaked into our life in many ways. The traditional upbringing my husband had versus the free-thinking ,hippie childhood I had growing up certainly, came to play in our parenting methods. I wanted to be very matter of fact regarding the kids body parts, while Nik felt we should just pretend they didn't exist. One day, my daughter exclaimed that "her china needed a shower because she wanted to keep it from getting tinky!" All the blood rushed from my husbands face and I can't remember the exact tirade but, it involved words like "convent" and "chastity belt". I'm guessing, he wanted me to make up cutsie names like "girlie bits" for Lexi and "Unit" for the boys. We better figure out the solution soon because Alexia is convinced she has a penis and that she can pee "tanding up" and since we can't come to an agreement ,on the proper term, I can't correct her.
The other way that our respective upbringings have challenged us is our opposing view on pets. Don't get me wrong, Nik likes them. However,his mom believes they're dangerous, walking, breathing disease infestations. He never had a family pet. I didn't think this mattered until the day we brought our first child home from the hospital. Nik began spraying lysol all over the parameters of the rooms that the dog went into. It got so bad that the paint began peeling off the walls of our rented apartment. To make matters worse, he began washing the dog daily, in antibacterial hand soap. Our min- pin looked like a cross between a hairless cat and a piglet. The dog looked pathetic! When we took him out for walks, people tried to look away from the sad looking creature that, was our family pet. The only exception was this sweet, elderly neighbor whose sight was clearly failing. She asked me for the name of my breeder. She actually thought he was supposed to look like that! I've tried to comfort Nik and help him realize that when it comes to kids and pets, death isn't lurking on every strand of pet hair. The situation exacerbated when I brought home a cat. Nik was sure the little kitten was just standing in wait for us to doze off in a slumber so it could suck the life out of us! He honestly believed that they're evil creatures sent here from satan to suck out our souls, while we sleep! I have yet to figure out a convincing rebuttal to this since you can't use logic with such an irrational claim.
On the bright side of my husband and I being so divergent, our kids get the best of both worlds. I'm hoping they will grow up to be very polite, bright, children who are ,also, free thinkers. Nik fears the worst with all our mixed messages and thinks they might be stuffy,disturbed adults that own time shares at nudist colonies. He wakes up vaguely mumbling,every so often, saying something about Alexia being stuck in a place that she uses her "girlie bits" flagrantly, all about the town. I try to encourage him by exclaiming that, it was he, who won the foot stepping battle at our wedding, while I keep my fingers crossed tightly, behind my back. At which time, he denounces my generous offering with a kiss on the cheek while also, managing to cross his fingers, somewhere out of my view. Our life may not be one you would pick but, marriage comes in many flavors. Any good cook will tell you that combining ingredients that seem like they shouldn't mix can be tricky! With a little imagination ,however, and a large serving of patience it can result in something that ignites all your senses that will be passed from generation to generation.